'Swamiji! I am a postgraduate. It is more than ten years since I completed my studies. So far, I have not received even a single interview card from the employment exchange. So, I am working as a cashier in a restaurant. This job has no connection whatsoever with my educational qualifications. Last month, there was a shortage of cash at the counter. I do not know it happened. The shame of being accused loomed large my mind. I thought I could pawn one of my wife's jewelry and replace the missing amount. But my wife refused. I asked my mother. She only fired me, but did nothing to help me! In this world, my own mother and wife were not ready to save my honor!'
I told him, ‘Leave alone the fact that your mother and wife not trust you. Do you trust yourself? Think deeply! You lack the confidence to take risks in life. So, you are stuck a job that you dislike. Since you dislike your job, you are unable to do it with full involvement. Because of this, you are not able to remember how that money was missing! So, your problem is not your wife or mother. It is you, yourself ! Lack of self-confidence is your problem. First try to overcome it.'
In order to foster growth of self-confidence, three qualities are absolutely essential.
Firstly, we should never give into worries, sadness and self-pity. Instead learn to feel good and build self-esteem.
Secondly, we should learn new skills.
If we do not acquire new skills, we cannot develop self-confidence! What I mean by skill is, expertise in some field, which is of interest to us. It could be carpentry, gardening, painting, cooking, plumbing…. Select any field, learn it and train yourself in it!
Finally, the ability to take on responsibility and be accountable.
You, would have seen some employees in Government Service. When you ask them a question, they will never give a definite answer of 'Yes' or 'No.' Their replies are either vague or incomplete. If an issue is to be resolved, they will Listen to the whole narration, only to say at the end, 'Well, why don't you go directly to the higher official and tell everything?' This behavior is dubbed as 'cautiousness'. They would pat themselves with pride for having such a sense Of cautiousness'!
This is definitely not cautiousness ... it is just passing the buck! Passing on the responsibility to someone else. It is a very disgusting thing to do. Persons with self-confidence take responsibility on themselves. Look at the history of successful people.There are many who have succeeded in life, without education, money and why, even arms or legs! There are such achievers; but no person has succeeded without self-confidence.
In Olympics, why do only a few countries win gold medals repeatedly?
When an athlete is participating in a race, even if he thinks just for a moment that he might lose, it is enough to make him lose. He would not be able to perform with his full strength in the race after such a thought has entered his mind. So, not only while participating, but also while practicing, he must tell himself repeatedly with a strong belief- 'I am going to win!' Go on playing the mental video of you winning and position yourself powerfully. This is known as 'Mental Rehearsal'.
Recently one of my students asked, 'Swamiji! I am not like others. I did not depend on a government job; I invested all my money in business. I faced a huge loss and now I am broke. Tell me how I can fill myself with selfconfidence?'
There were umpteen failures in the life of Abraham Lincoln.
When he was 7 years old, his family was forced out of home on a legal dispute.
At 9, his mother died.
At 22, he lost his job as a clerk.
At 25, he was defeated in a legislature election.
At 27, he had nervous breakdown.
At 28, he lost his beloved.
At 30, he lost the election for the post of a speaker.
At 35, he lost the Congress election.
At 46, he lost the Senatorial elections- around the same time he lost his son.
At 47, he lost the Vice Presidential elections.
These failures could not shake his self-confidence!
At 52, he became the President of USA.
So, please do not allow the past to damage your self-confidence!
Therefore, Oh, Life Relax Please!
Yoga of Wisdom:
Self confidence is not the absence of fear; but the conquest of it.
Yoga of Action:
Keep your chin up and knees prayerfully down, you will learn from losing.
Contemplation:
Fear is food for fools.
Unhappiness dwells in the ruins of fear.
Poor self-esteem builds a world of hell.
A good archer is not known by his bow and arrow but by his aim.
-Swami Sukhabodhananda, Oh, Life Relax Please!
http://www.pdf-archive.com/2012/08/16/oh-life-relax-please/oh-life-relax-please.pdf
I told him, ‘Leave alone the fact that your mother and wife not trust you. Do you trust yourself? Think deeply! You lack the confidence to take risks in life. So, you are stuck a job that you dislike. Since you dislike your job, you are unable to do it with full involvement. Because of this, you are not able to remember how that money was missing! So, your problem is not your wife or mother. It is you, yourself ! Lack of self-confidence is your problem. First try to overcome it.'
In order to foster growth of self-confidence, three qualities are absolutely essential.
Firstly, we should never give into worries, sadness and self-pity. Instead learn to feel good and build self-esteem.
Secondly, we should learn new skills.
If we do not acquire new skills, we cannot develop self-confidence! What I mean by skill is, expertise in some field, which is of interest to us. It could be carpentry, gardening, painting, cooking, plumbing…. Select any field, learn it and train yourself in it!
Finally, the ability to take on responsibility and be accountable.
You, would have seen some employees in Government Service. When you ask them a question, they will never give a definite answer of 'Yes' or 'No.' Their replies are either vague or incomplete. If an issue is to be resolved, they will Listen to the whole narration, only to say at the end, 'Well, why don't you go directly to the higher official and tell everything?' This behavior is dubbed as 'cautiousness'. They would pat themselves with pride for having such a sense Of cautiousness'!
This is definitely not cautiousness ... it is just passing the buck! Passing on the responsibility to someone else. It is a very disgusting thing to do. Persons with self-confidence take responsibility on themselves. Look at the history of successful people.There are many who have succeeded in life, without education, money and why, even arms or legs! There are such achievers; but no person has succeeded without self-confidence.
In Olympics, why do only a few countries win gold medals repeatedly?
When an athlete is participating in a race, even if he thinks just for a moment that he might lose, it is enough to make him lose. He would not be able to perform with his full strength in the race after such a thought has entered his mind. So, not only while participating, but also while practicing, he must tell himself repeatedly with a strong belief- 'I am going to win!' Go on playing the mental video of you winning and position yourself powerfully. This is known as 'Mental Rehearsal'.
Recently one of my students asked, 'Swamiji! I am not like others. I did not depend on a government job; I invested all my money in business. I faced a huge loss and now I am broke. Tell me how I can fill myself with selfconfidence?'
When he was 7 years old, his family was forced out of home on a legal dispute.
At 9, his mother died.
At 22, he lost his job as a clerk.
At 25, he was defeated in a legislature election.
At 27, he had nervous breakdown.
At 28, he lost his beloved.
At 30, he lost the election for the post of a speaker.
At 35, he lost the Congress election.
At 46, he lost the Senatorial elections- around the same time he lost his son.
At 47, he lost the Vice Presidential elections.
These failures could not shake his self-confidence!
At 52, he became the President of USA.
So, please do not allow the past to damage your self-confidence!
Therefore, Oh, Life Relax Please!
Yoga of Wisdom:
Self confidence is not the absence of fear; but the conquest of it.
Yoga of Action:
Keep your chin up and knees prayerfully down, you will learn from losing.
Contemplation:
Fear is food for fools.
Unhappiness dwells in the ruins of fear.
Poor self-esteem builds a world of hell.
A good archer is not known by his bow and arrow but by his aim.
-Swami Sukhabodhananda, Oh, Life Relax Please!
http://www.pdf-archive.com/2012/08/16/oh-life-relax-please/oh-life-relax-please.pdf
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